Twilight: A Bad Review

I like vampires since I heard of Count Dracula back in elementary days, dunno but while most of the kids shivered hearing the name, my reaction was both ecstatic and deeply intrigued. Tons of movies about vampires had filled my growing years and the more I see them the more I became a fan. Now I have been warned that Twilight is for the Teenybopper crowd but I want to see it for myself. I was embarrassed to line up for the tickets because as what I feared most came true; bundle of giggling girls and teenage boys were my contemporaries in the ticket booth. Then the movie started rolling and I sighed with disbelief...here are the things I found "out-of-the-place" in both the concept and facts about vampires in this storytelling:


1. Vampires being vegetarians...this is a joke right? Count Dracula must be spinning on his grave for this insult of his kind

2. Instead of burning when in sunlight, vampires just glitter like Britney Spears on her Toxic Video

3. They can read minds...it’s possible but the way the writer explain was somewhat "surreal"

4. The vampire boy talking about Exact Brand of Heroin...Haha!


Good Things I found about the movie.

1. I really like the new-girl-in-school scenario where she meets an intriguing person, in this case, a vampire with speed that will make Flash run for his money, and hey, he's strong too (take note Clark Kent)

2. Bella meeting the whole vampire family of Edward, it was funny because she's not afraid of them being blood-sucking royalties but afraid they might not approve of her

3. I think the poster is sexy


Pros and Cons of watching Twilight

For Girls: They might start expecting their guys to be their knight-in-shining-armor the moment they went out of the cinema, or being faithful for them and expect boys to be there forever (men, we're not vampires though we love dinuguan)


For Boys: The feeling of being not good enough for their woman. Questions like Can I protect her from harm or Am I Good enough for her? (Dude, she's expecting you to be that guy from Twilight: white-face, red lips and ruffled hair...untidy in short)



The characters I like:

* Edward Cullen:

Though his hair and red lips were against my principles, I think his courage was heroic (if not intimidating) because the girl needs all the protection she could muster...

Fave Scene: Seeing him and Bella doing the Spiderman-Thing up in the treetops made me loath our genetic adaptation of not having the ability to fly.

Cheesiest Line: "Bella, I don't know if I could live with myself if I ever hurt you. You don't know how it's tortured me. The thought of you still, white, cold ... to never see you blush scarlet again, or see that flash of intuition in your eyes when you see through my pretenses... it would be unendurable. You are the most important thing to me now. The most important thing to me ever."


* Alice Cullen:

Instead of the weakling main-character Bella, this woman caught my attention. She's so refined, classy, and sophisticated, and the way she jumped to kill that other vampire in the ending didn't kill that effect and by the way, she can see the future.

Fave Scene: When she was the pitcher in the Baseball game. The way she handles the ball and stretched her legs; Now this is the real definition of woman of the highest class.

Cheesiest Line: Nothing that I could remember...I was busy drooling over on how elegant her every action was...



To cap it all, I can say that Twilight is the ultimate metaphor movie for Teen Lust and a deeply intriguing guilty-pleasure for the Adults...Just hope the second movie lives up to its predecessor...